Giving up Wine 

I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman who asked me for a couple of pounds for some food.

I got out my purse and took a ten pound note out and asked, 'If I give you this money, will you buy wine with it instead of food?'

'No, I had to stop drinking years ago', the homeless woman told me.

'Will you use it to go shopping instead of buying food?' I asked.

'No, I don't waste time shopping,' the homeless woman said. 'I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive.'

'Will you spend this in a beauty salon instead of food?' I asked.

'Are you NUTS !' replied the homeless woman. ' I haven't had my hair done in 20 years!'

'Well,' I said, 'I'm not going to give you the money.
Instead, I'm going to take you out for dinner with my husband and me tonight.'

The homeless woman was shocked. 'Won't your husband
be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting.'

I said, 'That's okay. It's important for him to see what a woman looks like after she has given up shopping, hair appointments, and wine.'   

     
Strange but interesting. 

This is a car  advertisement from Great Britain. When they finished  filming the ad, the film editor noticed something  moving along the side of the car, like a ghostly  white mist. 

They found out that a person had been  killed a year earlier in that exact same spot.   

The ad was never put on TV because of the  unexplained ghostly phenomenon. 

Watch the front end  of the car as it clears the trees in the middle of  the screen and you'll see the white mist crossing in  front of the car then following it along the road....Spooky! 

Is it a ghost, or is it simply mist?  You decide. If you listen to the ad, you'll even  hear the cameraman whispering in the background  about it near the end of the commercial.

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(AND IN THE PROCESS GRANDCHILDREN)     To those of us who have children in our lives, whether they are our own, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, or students... here is something to make you chuckle. Whenever your children are out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that even God's omnipotence did not extend to His own children. After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve. And the first thing he said was "DON'T!"     "Don't what ? " Adam replied.   "Don't eat the forbidden fruit." God said.   "Forbidden fruit ? We have forbidden fruit ? Hey Eve..we have forbidden fruit ! "     "No Way ! " "Yes way ! " "Do NOT eat the fruit ! "    said God.     "Why?"   "Because I am your Father and I said so ! " God replied, wondering why He hadn't stopped creation after making the elephants. A few minutes later,  God saw His children having an apple break  and He was ticked ! "Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit ? " God asked.     "Uh huh," Adam replied. "Then why did you ? " said the Father. "I don't know," said Eve. "She started it ! " Adam said. "Did not ! " "Did too ! " "DID NOT ! " Having had it with the two of them, God's punishment was that Adam and Eve should have children of their own. Thus the pattern was set and it has never changed.   BUT THERE IS REASSURANCE IN THE STORY ! If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children wisdom and they haven't taken it, don't be hard on yourself. If God had trouble raising children, what makes you think it would be a piece of cake for you ?   THINGS TO THINK ABOUT ! 1. You spend the first two years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up. 2. Grandchildren are God's reward for not killing your own children. 3. Mothers of teens now know why some animals eat their young. 4. Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said. 5. The main purpose of holding children's parties is to remind yourself that there are children more awful than your own. 6. We childproofed our homes, but they are still getting in.   ADVICE FOR THE DAY: Be nice to your kids. They will choose your nursing home one day.      AND FI N ALLY: IF YOU HAVE A LOT OF TENSION AND YOU GET A HEADACHE, DO WHAT IT SAYS ON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE: "TAKE TWO ASPIRIN" AND "KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN"!!!!!